Friday, February 3, 2012

Female Drivers vs Male Drivers

All photos from Google Images. 

Women are fucking ngiao ci (hokkien: stingy), they will NEVER let you overtake or give way to others but they expect men to give way to them.

Men just can't be fucked. If you've got the skill, then, by all means!

Women will scold anything and anyone even if its their own goddamn fault. Eg. Can't get out of parking. Someone overtakes them. You scare them by honking at them because they don't know how to drive etc.

Men just can't be fucked. If they are really pissed off, they'll just overtake you.

Women are fucking paranoid, they will keep breaking for no fucking reason and men?
Men they just can't be fucked. Even if they don't know their way, they will just lap kin ki (hokkien: speed) and when they realize they are going down the wrong road or have missed a turning, they'll just make a u-turn!

Women are indecisive when it comes to a junction. They will think and think and think until the sun goes down and the car behind them honks which scares them shitless and they will start scolding the driver behind them. And they will continue to think until the oncoming car is too damn near and THEN decide to just STEP ON IT.

Men... Well, they just can't be fucked. They don't think for 20 minutes whether or not they should go, they decide within 0.2 seconds and chiong (hokkien: rush/go for it)!

Women can't park or get out of a parking to save their life. The perfect example of this is they will keep trying to fit their tiny car into a parking lot that is bigger than needed and give up when they are almost fully parked. Another is if they have to reverse out of a parking lot. They will reverse and park back in until some bystander can't stand it anymore and go over to help her. Not to mention that during the whole episode, they will be screaming obscenities at the cars parked by them. Saying that those idiots are the ones who do not know how to park and it has NOTHING to do with their own womanly driving skills.

Men has better judgement, they will either slide in/out effortlessly or let the parking space go if they think they can't fit in.

Conclusion is: Leave the driving to men or aspire to drive like men. And men? Let women do your shopping for you, because we are Gods of bargaining. :)

AND MEN, IF YOU DRIVE LIKE A LADY, PLEASE EFF OFF AND DIE. Oh, I KNOW you exist, I've seen you on the roads driving like an senile motherfuckaaaa! And I'll admit, I'm a lady driver, so I curse you and your entire family!

* Of course, the men I'm referring to are real men. Not ah bengs and chao ah sengs.

Be cool.


  1. Hahahaha! I agree with you about female drivers. Especially those who drive those big cars. They drive so slowly; on the fast lane! When you overtake them, they'll give you this look.

    I'm glad my mum isn't like that, though. She can do parking like a pro XD

    1. haha! then that means your mom drives like a man! good for her~ my brother especially hates big cars... he has this theory that ppl buy big cars cos 1. they don't have the skillz if ya know what i mean n 2. they just wanna piss ppl off!